I’ve been working on this song for a couple/few/several years. I don’t know, it’s hard to remember when it started. I think it’s called memory (still working that out). The idea of remembering is so fascinating to me. I have this thing I’ve said in the past, specifically if it feels like seismic shifts are happening in a relational space. “I’m grateful to exist in your memory.” I’m not sure what inspired that statement. I think it’s something about the fragile nature of being a living human person.
I’m deeply moved by the idea of communion. Specifically the sacramental idea of communion. Certain aspects of the Eucharist that Catholic folks engage with are beautiful to me. I don’t feel (currently) that I will ever be able to commit to the belief that a priest is going to administer my connection to the divine and that through that administration, Christ will cover me in grace. (This is a loose articulation and i’m definitely not saying this is deep Eucharist theology/I’m also just not Catholic, so please forgive any misrepresentation in this space). I do find it beautiful and I definitely am inspired by the sacrament of the Eucharist.
What an intimate, visceral moment.
To have the body and blood of Christ inside of oneself in a felt way through tangible engagement with tactile aspects of reality. (bread and wine). This is where my inspiration is drawn. Tangible engagement with tactile aspects of reality that bring me into communion with Christ. Rohr expresses the notion that Christ is the seed of all things. This idea of engaging with everything I come in contact with in my lived experience through an orientation that eagerly expects Christ to reveal himself to me through thisTM. (thisTM is a play on the fact that a lot of spiritual teachers talk about becoming awakened to the deep reality of the here and now.) I find this idea quite beautiful.
It’s something that softens the heart in ways that only lived experience can accomplish, (i think). Communion is fascinating to me. I love it so much. Remembering you, remembering me, remembering us. I’m still working out my own process with this. For instance, following a vibe down at the natural wine bar on Sunday night. The hospitality, the wine, the baguette, the oil and balsamic, Adele one night. It was something beautiful that drew me beyond myself into something else. Together. We’ll be together forever. I am in you and you are in me and we are in this together. Remembering each other.
It’s painful to forget. I’ve forgotten a lot. The illusion that seeks to bind and cast away and render useless the deep call of trusting, vulnerable love. I think this song is really, really deeply connected to my process these past few years and I have a voice memo that I love and I’m going to share it here. (Recorded while staying with my friends in Santa Barbara, CA on December 6th, 2021.)
structures of home 